[journal] June 24, 2003 at 11:42:00 PM CEST

Glückseligkeit

Morgens von dem Finale einer Zikadensymphonie geweckt werden, 46 Stufen hinunter durch ein Wäldchen zur Ägäis gehen, die da in der gleißenden Sonne völlig unbewegt daliegt, vom Licht geblendet sein, in das geschmeidig-samtige von der Viskosität her an Olivenöl erinnernde silbrig das Sonnenlicht wie Ölbaumblätter reflektierende Meer mit dem Körper peu à peu eintauchen, sich in die kühlen Fluten stürzen und langsam hinausschwimmen bis zum nächsten am Horizont aufragenden Eiland, das Meer ganz für sich alleine haben, für einen Augenblick der Herr der Schöpfung sein.

 
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[journal] June 23, 2003 at 10:40:00 PM CEST

The new world order

I was reading aloud to Catherine about Dorian columns, triglyphs and metopes in front of the Hephaistos temple in Athens yesterday when an American armed with a camera behind us suddenly shouted at me with indignation:

I was stupid and polite enough to do so. Or was I just scared? The guy could have carried a gun. You never know nowadays.

 
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[journal] May 31, 2003 at 11:07:00 AM CEST

Nicotine wisdom

It is no problem to smoke a couple of cigarettes once in a while after you have stopped smoking. The problem is that those cigarettes do not taste good. So you say to yourself let's smoke a cigarette I like. You smoke some more and suddenly you start liking them. That is exactly the point of no return when an ex-smoker has started smoking again. Cigarettes only taste well when the lung is already covered with a thin layer of nicotine. Whenever the cigarettes start tasting good, it is already too late. That is one of the countless tragedies of my life.

P.S. I did not smoke yesterday. The battle is not decided yet.

 
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[journal] May 7, 2003 at 10:16:00 PM CEST

Bewusstheit oder Lob der Langsamkeit

Zuerst kam mir die Idee glaube ich beim Joggen in Brouilla. Meine Kondition war wirklich Scheiße und ich bin ziemlich geschlichen beim Laufen. Aber irgendwie hat es mir Spaß gemacht, langsam zu laufen. Das Abrollen der Füße zu spüren. Mich darauf zu konzentrieren. Laufen ist wie die Erde streicheln. Da muss man vorsichtig sein und acht geben. Sonst geht die zerbrechliche Erde in Stücke. Wenn fast hundert Kilo bei jedem Schritt auf den Boden prallen, dann könnte das schon passieren.

Heute dasselbe beim Gehen. Beim Gehen die ganze Aufmerksamkeit auf die Füße lenken. Ganz Füße sein. Die runde Bewegung des Abrollens der Fußsohlen. Das gedämpfte, sachte Auftreten. Fast so leicht wie ein Balletttänzer. Oder besser Ballettgeher. Ich glaube, ich habe heute ein zweites Mal Gehen gelernt. Es ist wie ein Wunder. Der Erde näher kommen mit dem einen Fuß und sich dann von ihr entfernen mit dem anderen. Eine dauernde Bewegung. Die zur Verschmelzung hinstrebt, sie aber nie erreicht. Fast wie endloser Sex. Nur besser.

 
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[journal] April 24, 2003 at 3:28:00 PM CEST

jog blog post #1

Some ideas and thoughts which crossed my mind this morning on my jogging tour:

Last night I dreamt I had a mistress who gave me a map as a farewell present. Her place was on the map but not mine. I usually went to see her by bicycle (Morpheus knows why) and left the bicycle in the staircase when I stayed at her place.

 
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[journal] April 24, 2003 at 3:27:00 PM CEST

jog blog post #2

France is not good for me. I eat and drink too much here.

 
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[journal] April 24, 2003 at 3:26:00 PM CEST

jog blog post #3

What I really hate about drinking is that it makes me predictable. Last night after our bicycle trip to Argelès I drank the first two glasses of Rosé pretty fast. Catherine told me immediately that I will soon want to smoke a cigarette if I continue like that. Of course at around ten o’clock we bought a packet of Lucky Strikes for five fucking euros and I smoked four cigarettes.

Jogging every morning which I have done here every day except yesterday is also predictable. But it is a good predictability as it needs an activation energy; it is not automatic. It is a human effort and not a mechanical reaction.

 
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[journal] April 24, 2003 at 3:24:00 PM CEST

jog blog post #4

There is a hill on my jogging circuit which is steepest at the top. When I start approaching that hill I unconsciously slow down at first time in order to delay the strenuous rise. Of course this is rather short-sighted and does not really help but it is stronger than me. When running up that hill I slacken the reins even more as I approach the top for physical reasons. Just before reaching the top I seem to stand still. I run on the spot. But somehow there is suddenly a force pushing me up so that I arrive at the top.

 
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[journal] April 24, 2003 at 3:18:00 PM CEST

jog blog post #5

I’m a looser, why don’t you kill me, babe Mit der neuen Rechtschreibung ist Legasthenie salonfähig geworden. Irgendwie ist das symptomatisch. Die einzige Reform, die in Deutschland möglich ist, ist eine Reform, die sich selber abschafft. Statt von neuer Rechtschreibung sollte man eigentlich nur noch von den neuen Schreibweisen sprechen. Es ist allerdings ein Irrtum, anzunehmen, dass die Rechtschreibung in anderen Sprachen auch willkürlich ist. Wer jemanden als Loslasser bezeichnet, jedoch Verlierer meint, ist selber einer.

 
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[journal] April 16, 2003 at 9:22:00 AM CEST

Announcement of a subject change

I am a little fed up with myself that I continue posting stuff about politics and especially the war and the alienation between the US and some European countries. This is very important and moves me more than most music nowadays but I feel I should stop here for two reasons.

Firstly I wanted this to be a blog mainly about music and culture. I know that my political attitude is quite irrelevant especially in the view that I am not a very political person. I mean in the sense of politically active etc. By the way I am not a very religious person neither.

Secondly I think it is about time to accept the facts and to stop lamenting. What has happened has happened and nobody is going to reverse history. Therefore let's just hope that the world has become a better place after the invasion in Iraq and let's face the future and not the past now. It is always easier to criticise than to do things and get criticised by others then. I still think that the Iraq attack was not ok but that is really totally irrelevant now. End of politics mode.

P.S. There are probably several reasons for this change of mind. A kind of fatalism has settled in. Not the depressive and passive fatalism but more the kind of amor fati (love of the destiny) as described by Nietzsche. It is also my pragmatic side which seems to become more dominant. Maybe there is a relation to the fact that today is my fifth day of fasting. I only drink water, tea, filtered juices and clear soups plus occasionally a mix of coke and lemonade as a highlight and want to continue until Friday. After my 275 watt ergometer ride this morning I have lost 4.6 kilos from last Saturday morning. 94.9 kilos, I couldn't believe my eyes. I feel light and outside it is dry and sunny. Everything is gonna be fine. Even the Minima Moralia reading group seems ready to take off soon with the help of Mr Praschl and I am relaxing. Time to do some work outside.

The soundtrack to my current mood is Yo La Tengo's new warm and lovely album Summer Sun. Tracks 4 and 5 are what I'd call a perfect couple. No 5 is called Today Is the Day (download link) and I won't contradict Georgia there.

 
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